Sunday, January 18, 2009

Chuck Norrisisms... stupid but funny

  1. If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
  2. There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
  3. Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
  4. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
  5. Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
  6. Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
  7. Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
  8. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

2 comments:

Skinhead Barbiedoll said...

Chuck Norris is one hell of a guy!

Anonymous said...

VERY FUNNY! These are a few of my favorites:

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

When Chuck Norris goes swimming, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris.

In sign language, the sign for Chuck Norris is the middle finger. On fire.

Chuck Norris hits hard enough to change your DNA. Generations later your descendants randomly grab their heads and yell "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?"